Tuesday, February 26, 2008


my heart itches like adam's tattoo. recent self-introspection was like the needle, or the ink, or both. but it's healing now. and i like it's new look - similar to before...but different (a good different). and right now it itches.

how to get from there to here

i was looking through my posts, and this one was listed as a draft. back on 2-26-08, and today it is 10-30-09. maybe i posted something similar to it later...or not. here it is, one of the things i was thinking of that day.

i have thoughts, and ideas, and feelings that are swirling around in my head. and inside my head i understand them. i see them, hear them, and feel them. some of these thoughts, and ideas, and feelings are meant just for me. but some of them - some of them need to be shared, or expressed, or given to others.

and that's where i feel like i struggle. they don't seem to sound the same when i speak them. they don't look the same when i write them down. and their intention seems changed when i tell someone them.

it may be my imagination. or it may be true.

Monday, February 25, 2008

just so you know

i haven't been in a real good mood lately (another way to say it would be that i haven't been myself). it's a combination of things. so if i normally interact with you and something seems off...it's not you, it's me.
can you go through a mid-life crisis at 31? and what is a mid-life crisis?
second update in two minutes:
i guess if i only live to 62, this would be the perfect time for one.
3rd update:
it's almost 5. i'm happy i made it through the day. i think i'll go home and collapse, although i need to run 2 errands first.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

how 'fashion forward' i am

i went to lunch with my friend/coworker/boss josh today. as we were driving, he looks over at me and says, "my grandpa called, he wants his shirt back." i'm okay with it looking like his grandpas shirt. i like it. this shirt is a white, short-sleeve, button-up with vertical textured striping (that's as best as i can describe it with my limited fashion vocabulary). maybe ed can take a picture of it tonight as adam gets his tattoo. then i can update this post with a picture.

my haiku

i commented on carly's blog post titled 'wednesday haiku' with one of my own. here it is:

light wanes.
leaves fall in love.

i have other versions of the same haiku in carly's comment section, so i won't put them here.

Friday, February 15, 2008

recap/update - what a new year means

i had lunch with my friend ed today, and a topic that came up breifly was how my 'resolutions' were coming along. so let's see.
a few things i wish to achieve this year:
1. a career.
2. a relationship.
3. a healthy body.
4. get outdoors/travel more.
5. feed friendships.
6. get out of debt.
7. find god.
8. learn about my background.
here is where i stand two and a half months later:
1. i've told my employers (at the beginning of february) that i want to keep working there; that i want to turn what i do into a valuable position that merits a better salary. they seem all for it; i just have to realize that nothing happens overnight. so i'll work hard, and hopefully begin to see the fruits of my labors soon.
2. nothing new. i have started going to another church sunday mornings, so at least seeing new/more people is a step in the right direction. i have a split relationship personality - i'm in no real hurry...and i'd love to be in a relationship right now.
3. i haven't seen the inside of a gym yet. but i'm trying (and succeeding more than failing) to eat more fruits and drink more water instead of soda. baby steps.
4. i'm going to colorado to see becky and jay get married this summer. hopefully that counts, because i don't have many other plans. yet.
5. this is a roller coaster. i go from seeing and hanging out with friends every day, to seeing them once in two weeks. but overall i think most of my friendships are growing and improving. always more work to be done though.
6. right now there is no improvement. maybe i'll make more money soon - then i can begin to work on my debt.
7. not much new here. i am going to a second church, so that may be looked at as good. but sometimes you're not ready to back up the things you say. i'm not sure that i'm ready for god right now.
8. i've done nothing to help accomplish this yet.
9. i was hoping that by the time i got here, i'd have something to add. i don't.
there it is. remixed. remastered. now available on a two disc, collectors edition, signed blah blah blah.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

6 words

as far as our part of the web world goes, this meme was started with carly.
write a story in 6 words.
Legend has it that Hemingway was once challenged to write a story in only six words. His response? "For sale: baby shoes, never worn."
"Everyone hs a story. Can you tell yours in six words?"
here's mine:
when we die, let's die together.
i tag: heather stew, eleanore, dennis

Monday, February 04, 2008

good times

i had a lot of fun this weekend. friday i went to the opening of a new bar/restaurant with sara, adam, nick and nick. saturday i don't remember doing much until the evening when ed and heather invited people over to watch ufc fights before going to the landmark for drinks. then sunday was the super bowl, which was exciting and had an unexpected winner.
but saturday night at landmark was a highlight. if i remember right, there was ed, adam, myself, sara, woody, nick and kasey (if i forgot someone, sorry, but i think brian, the other nick and leah were out on friday). we rolled dice, had some drinks and cracked plenty of jokes. i adopted one (maybe two) nicknames...we'll have to see if they stick or not. ed finally dried up the landmarks store of seagrams 7 (my contribution was minimal). and i'd have to say that aces has become the groups 2nd favorite dice game behind liars.