Wednesday, January 02, 2008

what does a new year mean

in the fairy tale land part of my brain that i keep hidden way in the back, a new year equals a fresh start and the chance to enforce resolutions (resolutions which of course you'll keep). but i've given up on that. not that i don't want these things, just that i know me...and me never accomplishes these things. sad - maybe. pathetic - maybe. true - definately.
so what do i wish to achieve this year? i'll list many things here, and maybe one or more of them will be accomplished/acquired/experienced/and whatever else.
1. a career. what i mean by this is a job/career that can allow me to live comfortably (either by myself or with someone else); a job that i for the most part enjoy; the possibility to advance/improve/change.
2. a relationship. i thought of saying "love" here, but you can have love without having a relationship. you can also have a relationship without having love, but i don't want to get into that right now. but a relationship that would last me for the rest of my life. a woman that would love me the way i am (i would be willing to change some) and that i could love just as she is. i'm going to leave this point short, so moving on.
3. a healthy body. i used to go to the gym and play sports/be active all the time. used to. and my body reflected that. not that i could ever be the same person i used to be, i could be better than i am now. riding a stationary bike, using a rowing machine, lifting weights, eating better (much better), cutting back on the sodas, streaching (either yoga or just streaching). these are all things that can contribute to improved health, and weight loss. sounds great, i just need to do it.
4. get outdoors/travel more. i don't need to go anywhere exotic or thousands of miles away. but sequioa would be good. yellowstone would be good. northern california (beach, mountains, forests), southern california (beach), oregon or washington and so on and so on. included in this could be visiting/vacationing with friends (colorado, las vegas, etc.).
5. feed friendships. i have developed some good friendships (either by myself or with the help of others) and i want to strengthen them as well as make more. i've let some friendships die from lack of involvement. i've killed some by only taking and not giving. some i gave up on for the wrong reasons. but some i still have, and i want those to get better and better. so i want to give more to friends, learn more about them, be there for them when they need me, be there for them when they don't need me, be there for them when i need them.
6. get out of debt. or at least improve/minimize it.
7. find god. it's not that i don't know him, it's just that i don't know where he is in my life. i got careless and now i've lost him. he either fell out of my pocket or got left on a chair or was lent to a friend (which friend, i don't know). and it's not that finding him would solve all of my problems. there is a good chance that it won't solve any of them. but i'd still like to find him.
8. learn about my background. i know a little. but not much. i'd like to know alot more. generations and generations worth. back to who came here when from where. and back and back and back. i don't know how far back i will be able to go, but i have to try before i know.
9...
i can't think of anything else right now, but i guess that's a start.

5 comments:

Lulu said...

All good things Mike but I would add be happy with yourself and your life now, as you are and as your life is today. To strive to improve is always neccesary because it keeps things interesting and can instill a sense of accomplishment and direction, however if you are always looking for whats next, you dont enjoy your life as much in its present state.
I find that I do the same thing, looking ahead instead of living in the moment and I think that is something I really started understanding this past year. In previous years I was always looking forward to the next thing and when I look back I realized I could have had a lot more fun.
No groundbreaking philosophy or anything but just something to keep in mind.

timidvenus said...

and back and back and back... thats a good one. i think that its good to know where one came from. its important even. hopefully its stuff that someone in your family knows and can tell you, otherwise its going to be a long time finding out, but worth it anyway.

timidvenus said...

also, i was going to say that i liked this post. my favorite so far on your blog. very insightful.

Adam said...

You know Mike, after this coming week, there's gonna be a shitload of snow up in the mountains. Now would be the time to start planning that trip we talked about. Let's do it man. We'll go up and have some hot cocoa and you can check at least two things off your list (not that you can't do them more than once).

edluv said...

these are good goals mike. what are you going to do to actually accomplish them?